Crazy Dreams and What They Might be Telling Us

Candice Suarez
Jun 20
4 min read

“I had this crazy dream last night…”

When my husband is stressed or going through a transition, he has what he calls “crazy” dreams. My ever-analyzing mind always perks up when he says this. I start listening for the clues his subconscious might be offering (to him and to me).

Recently, he started a new job that—like most new jobs—came with a learning curve and a period of training. One morning, as we were getting ready for our respective days, he said, “I had this crazy dream last night.”

To make a long story short: We were in New York, and I had to pick up dresses (no clue what that part means!). He, meanwhile, had an important exam to prepare for—part of a class he was taking. As we raced around the city, trying to gather the dresses I just had to have, they started to feel heavy. So, I asked him to carry them—and he did. All the while, he was growing more anxious about the exam he hadn’t had time to study for and didn’t feel ready to take.

I had a few takeaways from this dream:

New situations bring stress and insecurity. It’s no surprise that his dream reflected the stress he was feeling in waking life. Being asked to take in new systems, knowledge, and expectations—all while trying to prove yourself—creates anxiety. This was obvious to both of us.
He was carrying my weight. What hit me more personally was this: Even though he was feeling overwhelmed, he still took on my burden. He carried my heavy load. In the dream—and often in real life—he sets aside his own stress to take care of me.

Here's the truth I walked away with:

He needs boundaries. He needs room to carry his own load, to focus on his own challenges — and not mine. And while I can gently point that out to him, ultimately, it’s his choice to draw and maintain those boundaries.

But I can help by doing my part:I can carry my own damn dresses through New York. I can respect the space he needs and be mindful not to pile more weight onto his already-full arms. Sure, at times in any marriage, we need to help bear the weight for our partner. The point is to check in and make sure we aren't all unnecessarily over-loaded.

What about you?

What boundaries do you need to set?

At first, setting boundaries can feel selfish. We worry we’re letting someone down. But in reality, boundaries are a form of care—for ourselves and for the people we love. They protect our energy and preserve our ability to show up sustainably.

We don't have to carry everyone else’s stuff.

We can say: This is mine. That is yours.

And we can walk a little lighter because of it.

Journal Prompts:

Whose weight am I carrying right now?
Where in my life do I feel unprepared or overwhelmed?
When have I sacrificed my own well-being to support someone else?
What boundaries do I need to set to protect my energy?
What does it mean to “carry my own dresses”?
What emotions come up when I think about asking others to carry less of my load?
How do I respond when someone I love is struggling?

Affirmations:

I honor my energy by setting loving and clear boundaries.
It is safe to let others carry their own weight.
I do not have to earn love through over-giving.
Boundaries are not walls — they are bridges to healthier connection.

TheWeekly Draft

What is it? I have talked to some of you about how I set up my week every Sunday evening. During that time I write/reflect on how my previous week progressed — the things that went well, the things I wish I had accomplished — and I plan for my next week. I set my priorities and goals, I reflect on habits, I timeblock my calendar, etc.

So I would like to invite you all in to my planning space.

I will open my personal zoom room every Sunday evening at 7pm for whoever wants to join me. We will co-work on setting up our weeks and have an accountability checkin for whoever needs it. HERE is the link to join (hit: it’s my personal zoom link)

ACTION NEEDED!

I'm moving over to my new website fully by mid-June. That means that I will need to shift all of your auto payments over to the new platform. I will be sending you all individual emails or texts with the date you should do this and the link to follow.

Office Hours: No more office hours this month. This is for Basic Coaching Members as well as any Premier Coaching Members who would like to touch base between scheduled coaching appointments. HERE is the link to schedule a 30-minute slot

The Weekly Draft: happens every Sunday evening at 7pm at this link. Come prepared to reflect on this past week and plan for the coming week, including the idea of implementing your own Kitchen Timer hour. Join me HERE